If you come across any special trait of meanness or stupidity . . . you must be careful not to let it annoy or distress you, but to look upon it merely as an addition to your knowledge—a new fact to be considered in studying the character of humanity. Your attitude towards it will be that of the mineralogist who stumbles upon a very characteristic specimen of a mineral.  —Arthur Schopenhauer

“What I fear is not the enemy’s strategy but our own mistakes.” - Pericles

Pericles trained himself to never react in the moment, to never make a decision while under the influence of strong emotion. Instead, he analyzed his feelings. Usually, when he looked closely at his insecurities or his anger, he saw that they were not really justified, and they lost their significance under scrutiny.

Learn to question yourself: Why is this anger or resentment? Where does this incessant need for attention come from? Under such scrutiny, your emotions will lose their hold on you. You will begin to think for yourself instead of reacting to what others give you.

But generally what causes us to go astray in the first place, what leads to bad decisions and miscalculations, is our deep-rooted irrationality, the event to which our minds are governed by emotion.

Envy is not a feeling that we are ever comfortable with, and so often we translate it as something more palatable — anger, dislike, resentment.

In other words, we do not have conscious access to the origins of our emotions and the moods they generate. Once we feel them, all we can do is try to interpret the emotion, translate it into language.

In all cases, the degree of awareness represents the difference. Rational people can readily admit their own irrational tendencies and the need to be vigilant. On the other hand, irrational people become highly emotional when challenged about the emotional roots of their decisions. They are incapable of introspection and learning. Their mistakes make them increasingly defensive.

We imagine we are looking for the truth, or being realistic, when in fact we are holding on to ideas that bring a release from tension and soothe our egos, make us feel superior.

The first impulse should always be to find the evidence that disconfirms your most cherished beliefs and those of others. That is true science.